So I was in the middle of Target standing in front of a wall of women’s underwear and I had no idea what I was doing. Abby said get the ones that will go above her tummy to cover her scar… so I grabbed a few. Each of the different brands had different size specifications. I mean, in Mens, we have Small, Medium, Large… etc. Women have Small, 4, 28… I was starting to panic. The number of women in the underwear section was growing. They were passing by me left and right, and I could feel them staring at me… judging me. They were giving me this look like, “Why is this guy just standing here and looking at women’s underwear?” I couldn’t take it. I grabbed a few different packages of underwear and headed to the register to checkout. Quickly realizing that I was in line with just women’s underwear… I grabbed a pound of Target brand coffee so I wouldn’t look like a weirdo and got the heck out of there.
Well, this is my life. This is the choice I made. And when my future son dyes his hair blonde (like his father did once when HE was a teenager) or begs me for the new iPhone 24, I will remember that moment at Target and remember the yes I made…to Abby…and to God. To buy my wife underwear because she just endured an Ovarian Wedge Resection. We are doing our best to say yes to what God is asking of us. For Abby, it’s to have surgery. For me, it’s to buy women’s underwear. I’d say that’s about equal… don’t you think? 🙂
And so here we are. We have taken the next step. Abby is in recovery mode and I wish I could say I understand, but I don’t. I will never fully understand because God didn’t ask me to understand. However he asked me to not get upset when Abby gets short with me because she’s in pain. He asked me to be uncomfortable because there is nothing I can do that can compare to the discomfort that Abby’s feeling. He asked me to play my part… “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her” (Ephesians 5:25)
This is the beautiful part of NFP (Natural Family Planning) and NaProTechnology. It is not just a method in which to achieve pregnancy, but a tool that can help mold a relationship of understanding and empathy. If both husband and wife are fully participative in this process, then that is when you start to see the real fruits. Husbands get to learn exactly what is going on within their wives’ body. It is no longer a mystery, but a miracle. Wives get to learn that the husbands will never fully understand the pain they go through and that there is no reason for them to get upset because of that.
So I’m just doing what I can… mostly praying that she gets better. That way I don’t have to buy women’s underwear anymore…but mostly so she can finally get a good night’s rest and not be so uncomfortable.
Abby approved pictures below.. 🙂